randomness and flow

something about life is so so haphazard no seeming order just one thing after the other, one moment then the next, a thought then another one, then another one to infinity it seems, or at least as long as I Iive, and, I think, beyond that, in some way. this feeling then the next, an idea a distraction, someone says this or that, I go this way and then I go there and then somewhere else. all day, ever day, day after day, year after year, life time after life time, one thing follows the other in seemingly random patterns that have never been explained to me.

I was born into a life that operates this way and I am in the flow of some giant river of seeming randomness, yet flowing together, if this river is wide, and it is, wider then I can know or imagine, maybe it is not random? Maybe the flow goes this way and that and backward and forward and up and down and it all is leading somewhere, to something, meaningful, purposeful.

it seems to be if I stay in the flow of the thoughts, feelings, people, places, ideas and events, I am getting somewhere from somewhere, and I feel ok, even good, because I am not resisting, fearing or controlling, so not getting in the way of the larger idea that might be, may be, likely is, at play.

tony gilotte